AN AGNOSTIC'S PRAYER

                                       AN AGNOSTIC’S PRAYER
                                               by Norman Spinrad

              agnostic (common definition): someone who neither believes nor disbelieves in God
              gnosis:literally knowledge
              gnosis mystical and philosophical definition: direct experience of the transcendent
              gnostic: one who believes that faith or the acquisition thereof must be based on such
                direct interior gnosis rather than dogma or scripture.

   As I write this I’m sitting in a hospital bed with stomach cancer after a serious setback, and because of who I am, all I’ve written for four decades, and my connection to extensive networks of good and caring people all over the world, I know, because they have told me, that many people, some believing Christians, Jews, maybe Muslims, are praying for me to the versions of God in which they have the sort of faith that I do not, some like me, agnostics, but giving it a try.

I am encouraged and deeply touched by all these prayers, and I somehow feel guilty for not being able to join them with prayers of my own, for obviously I would like nothing better than for my prayer and theirs to reach the ears of a benevolent, loving, omnipotent God who will then rescue me from this grave disease.

But I’m a gnostic, I suppose, I only believe in what I know or experience.  I have had what I do consider transcendent experiences, and indeed over 4 decades ago one of them did save my life.  But when it comes to such direct experience of the grace of Jesus, Jehovah, or Allah, I remain agnostic, having never been touched by such a thing.

And so, an Agnostic’s Prayer, 100% in public domain, do with it what thou wilt:

Dear God, Jesus, Jehovah, Allah, or similar caring, loving, transcendent being by whatever other name, I don’t know if you’re out there, but if you are give me a sign, touch my soul, fill me with your grace, and thereby prove to me that you exist.

By whatever means you choose, by whatever means necessary.  That’s not really very much to ask from such a God.  I ask for that now, and for my personal salvation afterward, only when and if I know in my heart and soul that I’m not whistling Dixie and praying a Hail Mary into nothing but the void.

All believers in you wrestle with the problem of evil and injustice rampant in a world supposedly created by a deity who is omniscient, omnipotent, loving, and just, a glaring paradox which can neither be denied nor explained by any scripture or logic.  To worship such a god blindly, a god who is the moral inferior of his human creations, is to simply bow the knee to superior power.

Of course those who do not believe in such a god have no such  problem, not believing that any natural morality, goodness, or for that matter evil, is inherent in the structure of the universe.

So God, Jesus, Jehovah, Allah, or whatever caring, loving, transcendent being by whatever other name who may be out there hearing this prayer, give me a sign.  I’m not praying for a burning bush or a physical manifestation of any kind, just the grace of gnosis of your existence in my soul and in my heart.

And then I will pray to you for my salvation as so many believers already are.  And then I will, like them, pray for the salvation of others in dire straights, and for the salvation of the world.

Over to you, Big Boy. If you’re out there, show me your face.

     

Comments

  1. JeffJuly 18, 2010 at 10:17 PM

    You ain't got nothing to worry about, Norman. There's an approach to this problem (death) that hasn't been tried yet.

    The rational one. The scientific one. You know, observation, hypothesis---and testing.

    Consider the following as a statement of logic, and rank it as "True" or "False."

    "If people possess immortal souls, it should be possible to logically deduce this by objective observation of their behavior."

    http://www.theninepointfivetheses.blogspot.com

    Souls are necessary in order to make the Universe stable, Norman. Unless all sentients are eternal beings, shutting down the Universe is the moral thing for all sentients to do.

    I actually saw it up close and personal once. Cat-soul dived through my chest. In the middle of the friggin' day. But hell, that's a ghost story, and who pays attention to ghost stories?

    Try The Nine Point Five Theses. It's all simple and clear as glass.

    I guarantee you an interesting read---

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anthony N. EmmelJuly 20, 2010 at 4:33 AM

    I'm wishing you the best. Keep the faith, brother.

    ReplyDelete

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